Sibling Bonding

A particular seen in today's reading that was very jarring and captivating was the infamous scene of Arthur and Morgaine recognizing who each other were after making love. This scene is very powerful because it causes distress to both Arthur and Morgaine for obvious reasons.

Even though the deed was so dastardly, Morgaine is trying to make as much sense out of it as she can, ""Don't cry," she said, helplessly, "don't cry. We are in the hands of her who brought us here. It doesn't matter. We are not brother and sister here, we are man and woman before the Goddess, no more"" (181).

Morgaine is trying to comfort Arthur by saying that their affiliations outside of the ritual do not matter because this is supposedly the Goddess's will. However, this still doesn't make the situation not distressing to the both of them. No matter what a higher power's will may be, one will still have deep regret for having relations with their own sibling which is a normal human trait.

Another key conflict that was brought to attention though was, why did Viviane allow this to happen? Viviane knew the Horned One was Arthur so why would she set this whole ritual up for the both of them to be together? Morgaine even questions this herself at the very end of the chapter when she's comforting her brother, "But even as she soothed him, despair beat at her. Why did you do this to us? Great Mother, Lady, why? And she did not know whether she was calling to Viviane, or to the Goddess" (181).

Morgaine is outraged that Viviane has done this knowing exactly what would happen. There's a lot of emotions and thoughts swarming through Morgaine's head, so much so that she doesn't even know what to believe anymore. The most she can do now is to stay strong for the both of them.

The Alignment Chart

Is Viviane chaotic neutral? Or lawful neutral? Where does she or any of the other characters fit into the alignment chart?

Can u bleed while u are pergert?

Dear diary,

I was gonna write waaay sooner, but all the rituals during the past few days have gotten me totally WIPED. My body is so tired that it can't even muster the strength to menstruate! I'm only taking a little bit of time before Arthur's coronation to write this much.

So yeah, my monthly courses are late, but nbd. It's just cuz I was in all those trances, channeling the power of the Goddess. It happens. This is totally and completely normal. It should be coming any day now. It's not like I got pregnant or anything. I mean, yeah, okay, I had sex during the ritual, but it was ritual. It basically wasn't even me; it was the Goddess. And the Goddess had to have known that the man who would represent the God would be my brother. And the Goddess surely doesn't endorse the mutant inbred babies of a sister and brother who have fond childhood memories of each other. Not that our babies would look repulsive if we did have them, for Arthur is too handsome. Aesthetically. I'm so proud of him, my handsome brother. I'd say that's how you can tell we are related (cuz we're SUPER related), but let's be real I don't look much like him. But we're still super related, so there's no way the Goddess would allow us to conceive a child, even for a ritual, so there's no way I'm pregnant.

Ha! I seriously need to stop stressing about this. Stress makes anyone's monthly courses even later! They also cause nausea, and I've been nauseous ever since I had ritual sex with my brother.* The nausea is, of course, do to fatigue and possession and stress. Not due to pregnancy. Because I'm not pregnant.

When will my monthly courses continue like normal? I HAVE NEVER CRAVED THEM SO MUCH.

Dear diary,

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

* (I can't believe I wrote that!!! I had to cover it with ink.)

(This isn't super relevant to today's reading, but I had to.)

When You Realize She's Your Sister...

Mrs. Galahad

Dear diary,

I still can't believe it. My mind is moving a thousand miles an hour. I can't even control my thoughts. There is just so much going on in my head, and it's all about him. That was really him, just standing there right in front of me. And what did I do? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. "Never lay hands upon an outsider, a priestess of Avalon must be even as a visitor from the otherworld." Thats what the old priestess always said. But that's so stupid. I haven't seen him in forever and now he was right there in front of me and all I wanted to do was to just reach out for him and hug him and tell him how much I had missed him. But I couldn't. These rules freaking suck. The boy I haven't seen since we were 12 is now all grown, and damn is he grown.  His muscles are so big, oh what I would have given for them to be around me right now. I wonder what he was thinking in that moment. He probably thought how weird I was, standing stiff as a board while he was all relaxed. Oh he will never like me the same way that I like him. But, maybe he didn't maybe he thought I was beautiful. And maybe it was his training that stopped us from embracing and feeling that spark that I know is there. I just know it is. He remembered me that has to mean something, right? That has to mean that he has been thinking about me too. I hope I will see him again soon. Maybe he will hug me. Maybe he will kiss me. Maybe he will ask me to be his. Maybe I'll get to be Mrs. Galahad. Ugh, why is life so hard?

The Great Mist

How does this whole system work with the God vs many god(s/esses) work?  Are these roman dieties or some other ancient beings? And where is Avalon relative to Britany?

Was Lacelet (Galahad) right?

Is Avalon real? Is it a different real from the world at conflict? A peaceful place away from life and death?

Mists of Avalon

I don't believe this passage is necessarily a feminist approach to this story. The emphasis on masculinity and the need for a God to match her Goddess (she really says this) is inescapable.  Lancelot proves himself to be the man's man when he says a few times that he "has lived in a world where men do not wait for a woman's bidding" (146). Morgaine exerts a lot of energy admiring Lancelot's physical appearance, and is heavily influenced by the way she feels when she's near him. Starting at their first interaction, her obsession with his outward appearance is perpetuated throughout the passage; on page 147 she spends almost an the page admiring every detail of his physique. She likes that his look is not androgynous, but especially manly like a "stag," and comments that she had "never seen such a masculine creature before" (147). This fixation on his appearance is especially annoying compared to Morgaine's own desire for Lancelot to see her inner beauty when she apparently sees only his surface level.

The physical attraction is noteworthy, but what really makes me doubt the woman-power in this passage is the fact that Morgaine says she has never felt happiness before Lancelot. She feels validated because “he desired her...his love and respect for her were so great that he would even hold his own desire within bounds” (154). So now we’re impressed that he's not pushing sex on her? Cmon. And let’s just take a moment to consider the phallic implications of Lancelot saying the only god he worships is his “sword” (140). Lancelot seems to quickly shift gears, and Morgaine feels a burning hatred for young Gwenhwyfar, concluding with what I think might be a redeeming moment (maybe just a petty one) as Morgaine leaves him to find his own way back.